Jokes thread
Re: Jokes thread
Paddy says to Mick, “Christmas is on Friday this year”. Mick said, “Let’s hope it’s not the 13th then.”
Some people are like Slinkies - they serve no useful purpose, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them downstairs.
Re: Jokes thread
Since the snow came all the wife has done is look through the window.
If it gets any worse, I’ll have to let her in.
If it gets any worse, I’ll have to let her in.
Some people are like Slinkies - they serve no useful purpose, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them downstairs.
Re: Jokes thread
Came home today to find all my doors and windows smashed in and everything gone. What sort of sick person does that to someone’s Advent calendar ?
Some people are like Slinkies - they serve no useful purpose, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them downstairs.
Re: Jokes thread
I’ve been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be honest, I only intended to rough him up a bit.
Some people are like Slinkies - they serve no useful purpose, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them downstairs.
Re: Jokes thread
After years of research, scientists have discovered what makes women happy.
Nothing.
Nothing.
Some people are like Slinkies - they serve no useful purpose, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them downstairs.
Re: Jokes thread
A lad comes home from school and excitedly tells his dad that he had a part in the school play and he was playing a man who had been married for 25 years.
The dad says, “Never mind son, maybe next year you’ll get a speaking part.”
The dad says, “Never mind son, maybe next year you’ll get a speaking part.”
Some people are like Slinkies - they serve no useful purpose, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them downstairs.
Re: Jokes thread
Two women called at my door and asked what bread I ate; when I said white they gave me a lecture on the benefits of brown bread for 30 minutes.
I think they were Hovis Witnesses.
I think they were Hovis Witnesses.
Some people are like Slinkies - they serve no useful purpose, but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them downstairs.
Re: Jokes thread
Q, Why do blonde's leave empty milk bottle's in the fridge ????
A, Incase anybody asks for black coffee!!!!!!!
A, Incase anybody asks for black coffee!!!!!!!
Understeer: when you hit the wall with the front of the car.
Oversteer: when you hit the wall with the back of the car.
Horsepower: how fast you hit the wall.
Torque: how far you take the wall with you.
Oversteer: when you hit the wall with the back of the car.
Horsepower: how fast you hit the wall.
Torque: how far you take the wall with you.
Re: Jokes thread
Q: why are hurricanes given womens names?
A: because when you first see them they are all wet and wild and when they leave your house and car are gone
A: because when you first see them they are all wet and wild and when they leave your house and car are gone
Understeer: when you hit the wall with the front of the car.
Oversteer: when you hit the wall with the back of the car.
Horsepower: how fast you hit the wall.
Torque: how far you take the wall with you.
Oversteer: when you hit the wall with the back of the car.
Horsepower: how fast you hit the wall.
Torque: how far you take the wall with you.
Re: Jokes thread
A military advisor rushed into George Bush's office & said "Sir, three Brazillian soldiers have been killed in Iraq.
George Bush says "My God, that's terrible"..........he then turns to the aide stood next to him and asks "how many's a Brazillion?"
George Bush says "My God, that's terrible"..........he then turns to the aide stood next to him and asks "how many's a Brazillion?"
Understeer: when you hit the wall with the front of the car.
Oversteer: when you hit the wall with the back of the car.
Horsepower: how fast you hit the wall.
Torque: how far you take the wall with you.
Oversteer: when you hit the wall with the back of the car.
Horsepower: how fast you hit the wall.
Torque: how far you take the wall with you.
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